What is that feeling in my gut?

I have this gut feeling
more than intuition
that something is happening to me
happening to me without me
happening because of me but with no regards to me
this kicking feeling in my gut
and the feeling is swelling steadily growing
has a life of it's own
breathing
making my own breathe short and uneven
and I feel like this is something that I should probably address
this feeling in my gut
this heavy
growing feeling in my stomach


I sleep it off
and I dream
of love
of life and a yard
playground


I hear the words.
"mama!!!!"


*nightmare*


(a nightmare is sometimes defined as a dream that comes true without warning)